Retirement planning would be simple if it were just math. But it rarely is. It’s life, family, timing, and emotion — all showing up in the same conversation.
I'm Tim Lux, CFP®, CPFA® — VP, Financial Planning at Kingsview — and I lead our advanced planning team assisting advisors and their clients with their wealth management needs.
Over the years, we’ve worked through thousands of real questions from real households — some straightforward, some complicated, and many that start with, “This doesn’t feel right…”
This article is built from questions like that — situations you may be facing now, or will face later. Or may never face at all. But I promise, whether it's a full on match or there's just an inkling of similarity, knowing how to spot the common pitfalls early and ask better questions will only help you make smarter retirement decisions with confidence.
And on that note, let's get started.
My mom is 64 and claims she works part-time. That “part-time” brings in about $500,000. She loves working. She doesn’t need withdrawals to pay bills.
But she told me she “started taking RMDs” because the custodian sent a notice and her advisor — someone I’m not sure I trust — said it was time.
That sounded off. I thought RMDs start later. If she’s pulling taxable money while earning that much… it feels like she’s volunteering for a bigger tax bill.
Is this normal? How do we sanity-check it fast?
Your instincts are right. For most people, 64 is too early for required minimum distributions on their own retirement accounts. When “RMD at 64” shows up, it’s usually one of these:
I would strongly suggest you and your mother setting up a meeting with the advisor and ask:
If it turns out it’s not required and she doesn’t need it, revisit the withdrawal plan immediately. Having $500,000 of income, plus extra distributions can stack taxes quickly. If you want to learn more on the ramifications of RMDs — including early withdrawals — we have a great ebook called The Retirement Tax Bomb you should check out — it's free to download.
My husband is 59 and got a buyout. He’s burned out and “needs an out.” He’s very good painter and thinks he could sell enough to make ends meet.
Meanwhile, I’m 57 and not working. Two kids: one in college, one starting soon. We’ve saved but we’re far from wealthy. We buy Toyotas every ten years and keep it responsible.
The buyout is tempting but I keep telling him the economy seems too mixed.
If we take it, we’d bridge health insurance to Medicare, maybe consult, and delay Social Security. I don’t really know, this is where my knowledge gets weak.
If we decline, it’s more years of strong income but the stress is getting to him.
How do you decide this without panicking or daydreaming?
First off, burnout is real. It hits all of us at different times… and it can be destructive. That matters, maybe even before everything else. That being said…
The smartest move is to stop treating this as one decision and start treating it as a bridge plan.
Take the guesswork out of the equation: complete a a 3-scenario Retirement Bridge Stress Test.
This takes Nostradonomy out of the equation — you don’t need to predict the economy, but instead establish your plan works in more than one version of reality.
Run three scenarios with your advisor:
If the plan holds up across all three, the buyout becomes a lifestyle choice. Good news: he’s good to become the painter he always wanted to be. I would not depend on that, but if it works out, that’s great. And if it doesn’t, you’re fine, too.
Where an advisor helps: model taxes, healthcare costs, withdrawal sequencing, and timing decisions (especially Social Security) so you’re not making a permanent decision with temporary assumptions.
I need you to tell you a secret.
My brother is 39 and still lives with my parents. He's a cliche of McConaughey in Failure to Launch. He’s not helpless and definitely not stupid — he was a trader at Citi until getting let go last March. He didn’t save a dime though, some of which was because of health issues.
Meanwhile, my parents are 66 and 67. They still have a mortgage. They’re careful people. But they’ve normalized this setup for so long it now feels permanent. He doesn’t pay rent. He “helps with groceries,” but I don’t think he’s seen the floor of a grocery story in the past ten years.
They cover the rest: utilities, car insurance, He sometimes borrows their credit card for “work stuff” that looks a lot like life stuff (it’s small potatoes but adds up).
Now, my dad admitted at dinner last week they’re taking “a little extra” from their IRA to cover monthly cash flow. I nearly exploded when I heard this. It feels like he’s going to drain them dry.
Every time I bring it up, my mom goes quiet and my dad yells at me. What do they need to do, so this doesn’t wreck their retirement?
And yes, I know a full umbilical cord cut is in order, but they don’t see it that way.
You’re describing a retirement risk nobody expects because it shows up wearing a family disguise:
An adult child becomes a permanent line item.
The fastest way to address it—without turning it into a moral trial — is to use a retirement planning tool that forces clarity. Numbers matter—there’s a reason why shows on MSNBC exist. Numbers reveal the truth.
Step 1: Make the subsidy a number (not a vibe).
With a professional, list the Baseline Monthly Spend (mortgage, utilities, groceries, healthcare, etc.).Then add one separate line: “Adult Child Subsidy.” Include rent-equivalent, utilities share, food, insurance/phone, credit card float, cash transfers.
An advisor helps here in a very practical way: pull statements, categorize spending, and translate “we help him sometimes” into a real monthly number so your parents can see the tradeoff in black and white.
Step 2: Run three scenarios.
Now the conversation becomes: “Here’s what each option does to your retirement runway.” Harder to argue with.
Step 3: Replace the arrangement with a written step-down plan.
Then… show them the numbers and where it's going. The more they realize that small leaks can become big floods, the better they will be for their futures.
Questions may have been altered or edited from the actual submission for brevity, clarity, or anonymity. Questions may not have been submitted by actual clients and may have been added by Kingsview for discussion purposes.